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One of my favorite morning routines in the summer is taking my dog for a walk. I love watching the scene of our consistent morning path transform as we emerge from winter into spring, summer, fall, and back again. There is a spot on our walk where dozens of baby thorn sprouts have grown into a massive thorn thicket, heights of which surpass mine. Every day as we pass this mature thorn thicket I think about the pain that would be inflicted upon oneself if traveling by on a bicycle that jumps off course into this mass of prickers, I know, tragic. One day as I approached the thicket I saw something that captured my attention and drew me in. A beautiful dragonfly amidst the thorns. Her contentment sent my mind a-wandering. A wandering about life before, during, and after its awakening.

A fun side note about what I found as I wandered and wondered about the dragonfly amidst the thorns: a band called The Thorns who have recorded a song called Dragonfly, what?! Go take a listen, after reading this of course.

Life before AwakenYou

Most of us feel at the effect of our world. We have an inner desire to do more, to be more, to move out of the thorn bush that keeps pricking and piercing us. We get mad at the thorns, we blame them for where we are and why we keep getting stuck in the same crummy situations.

Relationship after relationship in the bliss of what is, yet held back from what could be. We push, or get pushed, into the prickers and then bounced into bliss, thinking this will be the time things change. It will be better this time around, I’ll remember the beauty amidst the thorns.

Eventually, the game gets old, we realize we are powerless to change on our own. We’re over the struggle and have seen evidence that others have found something better, something different. We used to think it was just perfect matches, matches that weren’t meant for our life, two dragonflies who have figured out how to maneuver the thorns.

Wait, we remember someone talking about changing their life and how that changed their relationship with their partner. They heard this odd story about creating the love life of their dreams without the other partner’s willing participation. Who was that? Where did she see that?

The thought slips away and life returns back to the same old same old, but then she sees a post, reads an email, searches for help, and her mind delivers a message.


She had tried couples counseling, individual counseling, and made some strides toward freedom but she kept getting drawn into the same old same old. She asked herself if there was really any hope, was she destined to live a sad life? She wanted and thirsted for something different, she wanted to break this cycle. She didn’t want to move somewhere else because she had done that enough with the same results. Then she remembered that life coach who had talked about something different, she was ready.


Transformed. Everything transformed. No longer was the mass of thorns a threat but a beautiful retreat that had her back. She saw every thorn in her life and what she had made it mean.

Unworthy, unlovable, unsatisfied, shameful, guilty, unsuccessful, dirty, ordinary, cold, weak.

She realized she had been living a life of lies, that the true story of the thorns was beautifully different.

Worthy, lovable, satisfied, willing, honest, successful, brand new, unique, beautiful, warm, loving, tough, smart.

Now seeing the beauty and purpose in the thorns of her life, she was able to sit proudly amidst the thorns knowing they couldn’t hurt her, only she had the power to do that. She knew her power wasn’t in escaping the thorns but loving them for what they were, always knowing the way out but no longer seeing the need.

When you look at the dragonfly amidst the thorns, what do you see? I see the beautiful mystery of nature and ask myself what it is teaching me. Is the dragonfly crazy or is it smart? It all depends on your perspective, that perspective will determine the outcome in your life. We can always change our surroundings but until we see our surroundings for what they really are; until we can love and appreciate them, new surroundings will eventually be like the dragonfly at the effect of the thorns instead of in the presence and protection of the thorns.

🎧 Audio version of blog here!


Are you struggling in your love relationship? I would love to help you fall back in love with the one you love. My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong women like you, and a few pretty cool guys, who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. Together we work from the inside out, meaning I teach you how to have a healthy, loving relationship with yourself so you can show up and simply love your partner. Let’s reignite your love relationship today, book your consultation call today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life-changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

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