Results Driven

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Humans, in general, are results-driven, whether we even know it or not, we are always creating some sort of result. I have always been result-driven, I went to college thinking I wanted to be a Chemical Engineer, figuring out the solution to problems on paper seemed very logical and came fairly easily for me. Wonderfully, it still serves me today because I like thinking about my desired result and work backward from there. So the day I found the self-coaching thought model, I was a bit in problem-solving heaven. The truth is that in my life, I haven’t always believed creating the results I wanted to be as possible as figuring out the result of an organic chemistry problem. That is until I found the self-coaching thought model.

This week we’re on week six of my seven-part series, where we are breaking down the very first, and most important tool I teach my clients, the self-coaching thought model. If you are just joining me this week, I invite you to go back to the first post in the series, my brain flossing post, and get yourself caught up before you join in here.

What is a result?

A result, according to Google, is a consequence, effect, or outcome of something. When we look at the self-coaching model, the result is the end of the model; it’s what we come up with when we see all of the actions we take. Your emotion fuels those actions we are feeling. The emotion we are feeling comes from the thought we are thinking about the circumstance in our life. Pure math. Sort of.

The result line in the self-coaching model is our result only, the result we are creating for ourselves. It will never include someone else’s result or what someone else is doing.

Past results

So now that we know where our results come from we can look at every result we have gotten in our past and see that we ourselves created that result. It wasn’t because of something that someone else did, we created it with our thinking. Stay with me, keep following along and this will start to make sense.

Let’s look at an example of a circumstance of a past ended relationship. Remember, we are always looking at ourselves; what actions did you take to create the result of leaving a relationship? What feeling drove those actions? What thought were you thinking about that specific relationship that made you feel that way? Obviously, there are many, many, many circumstances, or facts surrounding a broken relationship but we only need to look at one at a time to find that we created that result for ourselves.

Current results

The same goes for where we are right now in our life. Let’s use the example of being in a relationship with someone you have chosen. Maybe you think your result is that you are unfulfilled in that relationship, what actions are you taking to create you being in that relationship? What emotion is driving those actions? What are you thinking that creates the feeling you feel when you think about being in a relationship with that person?

Future results

Now let’s look at the circumstance of being in that same relationship that we talked about in the current results above. Let’s say you want the result of being fulfilled in your relationship. Now you can ask yourself how you’ll need to act, feel, and think about that very same relationship. We will need to change our current thinking so that we can get to this new result. We will have to think like our future self, the person who has already reached the result of being in a fulfilling relationship. I know, a bit mind bendy but 100% possible.

Our thinking creates our results and this is why I encourage my clients to think big, not limiting themselves, to write down all of their dreams. I help them not to fail ahead of time by telling themselves that their goals are only fantasy.

Action steps

This week I want you to start looking at your past, present and future results. Start writing them down, start a list for all three, and keep adding to them daily as you think of more results you’ve achieved or want to achieve. Write down the positive along with the ones you chose to think of as negative. Your brain will gravitate to the ones you consider negative so make sure you balance it out with those you believe to be positive, Then I want you to consider how you think about the ones you consider to be negative. What if you thought differently about them? What if they actually weren’t negative but exactly what you needed to help you move forward into something different?

Truly getting the results we want in our love relationships and our lives are just math. Over the past six weeks, I have broken down each part of the thought model equation. The thought model is the answer to every problem in our life; everything fits into the model, so now we can start playing around and creating results we want. Now that we can see our current results and how we achieved them, next week, I’m going to help you put it all together. You’ll learn how to use the equation to begin creating the love relationship of your dreams.

🎧 Audio version of blog here!

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection, and excitement you crave. Let’s re-ignite your love relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life-changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Actions Speak Loudly

🎧 Prefer to listen to the audio version? Click here!

Welcome to part five of my seven-part series, where I am dissecting the tool that changed my life, the self-coaching thought model. The self-coaching model is also the very first tool I teach my new clients. The purpose of the thought model is to help you see and feel the life you are currently creating for yourself and to decide if you like it. The model contains five elements that I break down in this series, and at the end of the series, I will teach you how to put the pieces together so you can start using it in your own life. At the end of this post, I share a worksheet that will help you start filling in the first four pieces of the model as you work through your thought downloads, and this week’s action piece.

If you are just joining the series here I want to highly suggest you go back four weeks to my Brain Flossing post and read forward, doing the work included in each step. We started in that original post talking about the process of doing a thought download where I included a Thought Download worksheet to help you get started. Next, we talked about the difference between facts, or circumstances, in our lives and the thoughts we are having about those circumstances. I added in a post after that to help create your partner love list by discussing negative versus positive thinking and how to change negative thought patterns. Last week we talked in-depth about feelings, what creates them, and what they have to do with today’s topic, actions.

What is an action?

An action is the fact or process of doing something, typically to achieve an aim.

That definition comes straight out of the Google dictionary and I find it quite interesting that it states that an action is typically to achieve an aim, a goal. Contrary to that though, we often take actions that do not lead to the goal we intended, it doesn’t keep us “on aim”. Actions are things we do or don’t do, including inaction. Actions can be something we can see outside of us like giving our spouse a kiss. They can also be internal, as in ruminating over the story we are creating in our mind about last night’s discussion with your partner.

Why do we take the specific actions we take?

We take action based on how we are feeling.

Feeling work is some of the best work you can do in the five elements of the model because feelings are signals and we can feel their vibration in our bodies. Go back to last week’s post for more detailed information about how to discover your emotions. If you think you don’t feel emotions then think again. If you think you don’t feel emotions, you have most likely been practicing repressing emotion. Repressing emotion, or holding it in, is something we do in an effort to protect ourselves from getting hurt, to make ourselves look strong, to hide. Once you start allowing yourself to actually feel the feelings you will learn to love what emotions tell you. Emotions tell us something is happening. When we feel sad we want to be able to feel sad and explore what is happening for us, feeling our emotions is what actually allows those emotions to dissipate or soften. We can know that the emotion we are currently feeling is coming from something we are thinking about. What are we thinking? What is the fact or circumstance that I’m thinking about?

How to take different action.

Learning how to take different actions will require us to learn the first three elements of the model. Because feelings drive how we show up in our lives we want to understand what we are feeling and thinking about the circumstance we are acting in. Once we really understand these three things and how they are impacting the actions we are taking we can start looking at how to take actions we want to take.

  1. We could look at actions we want to be taking and find some emotions that could drive those desired actions.
  2. Once we have a few emotions to play with we can start coming up with some thoughts that will generate the desired feelings.
  3. We can also look at how we are feeling and decide how we want to feel and ask what we might need to think to feel this emotion.
  4. Then you want to start playing with different combinations and see if they work.

Some thoughts we won’t believe, that’s ok, ask yourself to try a different thought. Maybe the emotion you’re wanting to generate is one you can’t get to right now, try a different emotion that will start moving you in the right direction. The important thing is to start finding something that feels real for you and simply starts moving you in the direction you want to go.

Let’s look at a few examples.

Let’s say you are currently taking a few of these actions around the circumstance of your husband sitting on the couch watching football after dinner:

  • Blaming your husband for how you’re feeling
  • Complaining that he isn’t doing enough around the house
  • Not talking to him
  • Stomping around the house
  • Sarcastically asking him to do things
  • Find more things to do to look busy
  • Don’t relax
  • Make tasks more important than enjoying husband
  • Wanting to change him
  • Overeat
  • Judging him
  • Don’t think of ways to connect

The feeling driving these actions might be disappointed, resentment, self-pity. Maybe you’re thinking something like “He never helps out around the house.” “He doesn’t help me.” “He is lazy.” “My dad does such a better job.”

You could think of different actions you want to take or different thoughts you want to think or the feeling you might want to feel. For this example, let’s just look at feeling compassion or mindful or peaceful or content. What might you need to think to feel any of these emotions? Maybe:

  • “I love getting my house in order before I go to bed.” could make you feel peaceful.
  • “My husband deserves some time to chill.” could make you feel compassionate.
  • “I’m looking forward to my time to sit and chill too.” might make you feel motivated.
  • “I wonder if he might be interested in helping me out.” could make you feel curious.

All of these thoughts and feelings will drive different actions like:

  • Enjoying doing what you want to do
  • Allowing your husband to do what he wants to do
  • Kindly asking if he could help but not make it mean anything if he doesn’t
  • Planning downtime with husband
  • Planning tasks and getting them done within the allotted time
  • Plan ways to connect while doing tasks
  • Remembering why you like getting things done
  • Don’t judge him

As you learn these steps, it will start to become clear to you that it is 100% possible to be in control of how your future dream can become your reality. You are always in control of the results in your life and what you make those results mean. Practice this work, and if you have any questions, please get in touch with me, I’ll help you work through your obstacles. Let’s create the change you want in your love relationship starting today.

Oh, that worksheet I told you about: Model Practice Page

🎧 Audio version of blog here!

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

MyΒ Awaken(TheTrue)YouΒ program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection, and excitement you crave. Let’s reignite your love relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life-changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Practicing Vulnerability

Vulnerability is a moment in time when you let your walls down. It’s exposing our raw, unprotected self for others to see, leaving us open for critique, judgment and emotional harm. I’ve often compared it to standing out in the middle of the street bare naked. Sounds painful but I’ve learned that it doesn’t have to be and I’ve learned that it can be painful but that it’s only temporary and always worth it.

The truth is, I’m not really interested in standing naked in the middle of the street. I don’t see the value, but when I see I’m not taking action on something that will move me forward I seem to visualize this scenario. Then I like to think about the result I would have I took this action I’m dreading. This allows me to embrace that feeling, remind myself that a feeling never killed anyone, remind myself of how awesome it will feel having the result and I dive in, head first. Sometimes the result is different than I anticipated but I always grow from the experience because it opens doors that I wouldn’t have known were there if I stayed stuck in fear.

Unwillingness to open up and expose your inner self – your true self – you in your full truth – is what keeps our marriages from connecting on a deep level.

As humans, we have an innate desire for connection, we are biologically wired for it. According to vulnerability expert, Brene Brown, it’s why we are here, it gives us purpose and adds meaning to our lives.

When we expose our fragile, tender inner selves, expose our hurts, our physical and emotional soft spots, it feels uncomfortable and dangerous. It’s even possible that we’ve experimented with being open and honest about ourselves but were completely unprepared for how another person might react. We possibly made their reaction mean something about who we are as a human thus making us less willing to do it again. This is where shame comes in. Shame really comes from the fear of being disconnected, that if we expose our inner self people might think we are somehow less than, flawed, unworthy of connection. When we build up our self confidence and practice vulnerability we get to let go of shame, knowing that connection is created from within ourselves, nothing outside of us creates our connection with someone else.

Vulnerability includes not pretending, not attempting to manipulate how someone views us. There is no game playing, no trying to be better than, no falseness. When we are most vulnerable we are at our most raw, true selves – no lying, no pretending, no faking, no game playing, manipulating or one upping.

So exactly how do we start becoming vulnerable, maybe even for the very first time? Maybe after trying but deciding it was too painful, deciding what someone else did in response to our vulnerability was painful enough that we’ll never open up again. What I want to do today is help you understand that the process of you opening up is all about you and your growth. I want to help teach you that someone else’s response to your vulnerability is their business and has absolutely nothing to do with you and your value.

Let’s look at five steps you can take to become more vulnerable so that you can open up to creating a more deep and intimate marriage:

Learn how to feel an emotion.

The process is simple yet deliberate, and often abstract for the beginner but one of the best things I have learned how to do in order to get out of a negative thought space. You have to take the time to do the work of allowing the emotion to run its course. You have to pause and be willing to feel the emotion you are experiencing so you can start recognizing it when it comes again.

A feeling is just a vibration in your body, a chemical response to something you are thinking. That’s all. I have taught here that all thoughts are optional so when you recognize the feeling or vibration in your body, you can then start searching for the thought causing it. You might think that their reaction means you’re unworthy, which could create a feeling of shame. When you recognize that it’s an optional thought you can start to explore the thought that their reaction has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.

Build up your self confidence.

Self confidence is something you build by doing things that feel uncomfortable and not attaching any meaning about yourself to the outcome. It’s being willing to experience any emotion while moving forward with your relationship goals.

It’s different from confidence in that confidence is developed when you repeat something over and over. You become good at the thing because of the number of times you’ve taken action and now have confidence in being able to take the action again. Self confidence is doing something without knowing how and being willing to fail.

Self confidence is when you have your own back. You know you can do something and the result has nothing to do with who you are as a human being. Embarrassment, humiliation, rejection are all just temporary emotions that you feel, move through and move on, learning in the process.

Practice small steps of vulnerability.

Begin practicing with close friends, people who are open and vulnerable with you, and start small. Plan ahead of time what you will share and how you might comfortably weave it into the conversation. It might be as simple as being open and honest instead of embellishing or glamorizing your stories. Think about it like a dare to yourself, imagine feeling self confident, taking the action of opening up and not making the other person’s words or reactions not mean anything about you as a person. What if they never wanted to talk to you again? Would you make that mean that you’re unlovable? Remember, self confidence says you are fully lovable and worthy, no matter what another person thinks or does.

Maybe it’s even as simple as making a decision about date night. Maybe you always let him make the final decision because you’re afraid to commit to what you want to do. This small step of vulnerability would look like you deciding on purpose and sticking to it. What might you make it mean if he says he doesn’t like your idea? Watch what happens for you, maybe you give in and just do what he wants, telling yourself the story that you don’t really care anyway. Be curious. Be honest. Be you.

Let people be who they are.

Other people rejecting you or shaming you by trying to make you feel less connected, doesn’t change your worthiness. Learning how to feel what happens inside of you when people reject you takes lots of practice but it’s a skill that will build your armor of protection. This armor of protection is not to keep people from seeing in, from seeing your truth, it’s your self confidence shield that keeps you being all in on you.

The other view I’d like you to contemplate is who is shaming who? Are you making their response mean that they are telling you your opinion doesn’t matter? What if they are just being truthful, expressing their opinion and you’re just making it mean something different. This is where flavor and spice come into our relationships. If you’re always doing what others want to do then you’re not bringing your own flavor into the mix. I call that unfair to your relationship and to you! I say shake yourself all over and see what new recipe you come up with, who knows, your partner might even like this new flavor!

Find an accountability partner, a mentor or hire a professional.

Someone who’s done their own work of building their self confidence. Someone who has put themselves out into the world to help others can be a beautiful way to begin opening up with zero judgement. They’re all in on you and helping you become your true authentic self because they’ve done the work themselves and know the freedom that comes from it.

Hiding your true authentic self keeps us from blooming into our most beautifully created self. It limits us. Today you can shed that shell and start growing into someone who is solid in who she is and willing to put it out there, willing to shake her spice all over the world. This is the person your husband married, he married you and when he sees the raw, true you, he’s going to fall even deeper in love. He’s going to want more of your favorite dish served up on a daily menu plan!

Once you start exposing your inner spice, that’s when you open up to the love relationship of your dreams. Give this work a try and let me know how it goes, let me know what you’re struggling with so you can come closer to Awakening(YourTrue)You. If you think working together might be the next step you’d like to take, let’s talk about it. Scheduling a consult call will help you really decide if working with a coach is in your future and if it’s not, that’s ok because the conversation will be fun!

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection and excitement you crave. Let’s re-ignite your love relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Love Without Conditions

The dictionary definition of unconditional love is affection without any limitation or love without conditions.

This concept is something many of us struggle with. We think love is something we do for someone else. We think what someone does for us is love. Most of us have it wrong, we’ve been taught wrong. When we’re able to go from conceptual understanding to implementation of love without any limitations you’ll begin to understand the beauty of unconditional love.

Love by far, is the emotion that feels best, better than any other emotion. Think of memories that you have that feel amazing, past events that you LOVE visiting, those memories feel best because we’re remembering the emotion of love. We are feeling it again, in the present, by thinking of something, or someone, in our past and those thoughts are re-generating the feeling of love for us.

In our marriage, all we really want to feel is love.

I remember when the concept of love always being available in my marriage actually clicked for me. My coach had offered it up to me and that day I actually felt it could be true. This was definitely not the first time the concept had been presented to me, it was simply the first time I actually felt a flicker of possibility, of truth in that belief.

This was a magnificent moment for me. So beautiful that I wanted it more. Wanting it more allowed me to be more curious about when the feeling of love disappeared. It allowed me to more clearly see why I was allowing it to leave and to play with the idea of also being able to feel love in the same moment.

Before the concept of love without conditions became a reality for me in my marriage I had spent months doing working on the concept. I had some deeply seated beliefs that other people’s actions, inactions or words dictated whether I could feel love or not. To be able to shift from constantly being at the effect of other people to actually implementing personal control over how I felt was the shift that changed my life, forever. A shift I’ll never forget because the feeling of love is like an explosion of bright, open yumminess like no other!

Let’s take a look at some truths about unconditional love:

Unconditional love starts with you. The first person you need to learn how to love without conditions is yourself. When we are searching for our husbands to validate us in order to feel loved, we will never be able to freely give enduring, overflowing, unconditional love. Our ability to fully love someone else, without conditions, requires that we first understand that love. That understanding comes when we are able to express it for and within ourselves.

Loving someone unconditionally does not mean you have to accept how they treat, or have treated you, as being ok. You can love someone, even possibly sympathize with what may be happening, or has happened for them to take actions that hurt, but still choose to believe what they did was wrong. You still might choose to put boundaries on the relationship to protect yourself. Never seeing them, or talking to them, might be a choice you make while still loving them.

Choosing not to love someone ahead of time in order to keep yourself from getting hurt in the future, only hurts you ahead of time. Allow yourself to love fully, in the present moment, so that you can feel love now. If hurt or pain is to come in the future then feel it when it comes, there is no need to ruin your present to protect yourself from a possible bad outcome. I love thinking about training the brain to think about your future self as always winning. This allows us to live for a positive outcome now, to feel the emotion of creating that outcome. When the true outcome arrives, that’s when we can experience whatever emotion it brings to us.

Choosing love when it seems difficult or vulnerable, will allow you to take actions that will move you forward. Choosing love will keep you taking action from your higher self and keep you from taking action from an emotion that creates a result you may regret.

If you’re not feeling love then ask yourself why. Be honest. Don’t blame someone else for you not feeling love. Your feelings come from your thinking about what someone is doing. Own your feelings and then ask yourself if you like the reasons for your feeling.

Here is a fun and interesting exercise for you to try.

  • Ask yourself why you are choosing not to love.
  • Ask why you are choosing not to feel love.
  • List all of the conditions you are putting on loving and feeling love.
  • List the things you want them to do so you can feel love.
  • Ask yourself if you can do these things for yourself.
  • Now, close your eyes and imagine what it would be like to just feel love, all of the time, regardless of their actions. What would that feel like? Really sit in love and describe that love, embody that love.

This is true, real magic. From a place of love, you will show up differently and still be able to make choices that keep you in integrity with yourself and who you want to be. You’ll be able to follow through with what you will and won’t accept. Learning how to embrace the concept of love without conditions so you can start feeling love in your most intimate relationship is what we do in AwakenYou, my one on one coaching program. Taking this work deeper is exactly what we do so that you can start looking forward to going home to your husband with pure excitement and unconditional love! Want to try some work on your own? GREAT idea! I have the perfect free mini course for you, click here to get started now!

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection and excitement you crave. Let’s re-ignite your love relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Bring Sexy Back

Keeping your marriage thriving will require you to be intentional about nurturing and caring for your relationship. Often times the inner workings of what keeps a relationship healthy get set aside once a commitment is established. Unknowingly we prioritize other important aspects of our lives at this point, thinking something like that love song, “love will keep us together”. It often starts with our careers, our children, then we have our hobbies and outside friendships, church commitments and then years down the road we discover our relationship has “lost its sexy”.

I like to compare relationships to a life long project that we continually evaluate, decide on purpose what is working, what isn’t working and what we might do differently to get to our desired end goal. Compare it maybe to launching a business. We wouldn’t get licensed, register with the government, open our checking account, write our mission statement and then go on to other life goals hoping to come back every night with money in our bank account.

Whether you are just starting the journey with your love relationship and still madly in love, or you’re feeling like your marriage life is more like roommates with benefits. This post will help you be deliberate with what you want to create moving forward. If you’re still madly in love, it will teach you to prioritize your love relationship. If you’re feeling more like roommates with your spouse it will help you start moving towards where you want to be.

If you’re in the later scenario, thinking about bringing sexy back into your relationship might sound like some Disney fairy tale that you’ve resolved to believe is pure fantasy. Not knowing how to bring the sexy back is not the problem, the problem is getting over the uncomfortable feelings it might take to do the work of making fantasy your reality. The problem will be getting over your belief that you’re just roommates, that the flame has died, that there isn’t any hope so settling is good enough.

I believe your sexy is important, and however that looks for you, let’s start the process of bringing it back into your marriage!

First you have to desire to bring intimacy back into your relationship.

Having the desire to bring intimacy back means you care. Having the desire means you’re willing to come up with strategies to overcome the obstacles that are in the way of you having the intimate relationship you desire. Let’s look the definition of intimacy.

Intimacy: a close, familiar and usually affectionate or loving personal relationship with another person.

So now that we know what intimacy means, I want you to ask yourself why you want a more intimate relationship? An excellent compelling reason to do this work is vital to creating your ideal marriage relationship, so get some paper, pen and start writing.

As you write, notice what your reasons are. Are you wanting more intimacy in your marriage for reasons that feel good to you or do you think more intimacy will make your husband love you more? Remember that we cannot control other people and how they feel, so as your write your list make sure they are all reasons that make you feel good.

Go back and look through your list and cross off any reasons that you can’t control:

  • The ones you can control are the thoughts in your own head like being able to express love in ways that are important to you, make you feel love. A reason could be just because you want to feel love and stop feeling empty.
  • The reasons you can’t control are ones that dictate how he acts or treats you so that you can feel good. You can’t control what he thinks about you taking massive action towards your intimacy goals and you can’t control what he does, or doesn’t, do.

Second, decide on purpose what you want “sexy” to look like for you.

Be very specific and make sure they are all actions that you create for yourself. This is going to require you to come up with another list.

They might look like:

  • dressing in a way that feels good to you
  • acting in ways that feel like love for you
  • losing that last 10 pounds
  • creating conversations that stimulate interest and deep thinking
  • planning long hand in hand walks through the woods
  • warm and embracing hugs

Third is your action plan for achieving the intimacy you desire.

Now take a look at your lists, what is coming up for you? Maybe it all looks like that Disney movie we discussed earlier and you feel very uncomfortable even thinking about doing some of the actions on your list. Totally ok. Start with the easy ones like how you take care of yourself, things you can do all by yourself to improve how you feel about yourself. Then move on to the less uncomfortable ones like sending him a friendly text during the work day or leaving a love note in his lunch bag. Make all of these less uncomfortable ones completely comfortable while you work on strategies to start implementing the more uncomfortable actions.

Creating your dream marriage is like any other goal you want to succeed at. You wouldn’t go about losing 50 pounds by writing up a plan, thinking about it but never taking the bold steps of learning how to allow the emotion of wanting to eat food that’s not on your plan. So while you are taking the smaller, easier steps, start thinking about how you might implement some of the less comfortable steps. As you make the easier steps more consistent, you’ll notice how good they feel, this will make you curious about how the success of the bigger actions will feel (much better I promise).

Start writing down all of the things that are in the way of you taking the actions you dream of taking. Most of obstacles are your feelings of fear and discomfort. Think about what you could do to make the action easier. Let’s look at your desire to hold hands during that walk through the woods. Before you tackle all of your thoughts and emotions around the action of holding hands, you’ll have to actually plan the walk, when will it be, where will you go, what else might you do on that trip? Plan the whole experience, start visualizing it and think about how you want to feel during that special time you’re creating.

The fourth step is to start building your self confidence.

Building self confidence is one of my favorite things to do. Building self confidence means practicing things that feel uncomfortable and learning to make the outcome not mean anything about who you are as a human. Self confidence comes from being able to experience any emotion and come out on the other side stronger.

Here is an exercise for you to try around the hand holding example that will help you build self confidence. Maybe you have a thought something like “we haven’t done this in years”, which makes you feel awkward. When we’re feeling awkward we will avoid taking the action of holding hands, getting us the result of not holding your spouses hand for even longer.

Now think about the walk while feeling self confident, what would you do? You would hold his hand, feel the emotion of awkward, your hand might sweat a bit while thinking something like “I want this in my marriage.” Giving you the result of doing what you want to do. This will give you the result of getting your sexy back. The feeling you have after will be one of elation, pure glory and joy for what you created. One time won’t be enough to make it a habit but you did it and you built up some self confidence. It will encourage you to plan another event where you hold his hand, you will still have to be deliberate until this new hand holding thing becomes normal, but that’s ok, you did it!

Now apply this technique to something else on your list. The more uncomfortable things you make yourself do the easier they will become, the more self confidence you will develop. I have a free worksheet available to help you through this self confidence exercise, reach out to me if you’re interested in using it, I’d love to share it with you.

Having your solid compelling reason of wanting your dream love relationship will keep you taking one step forward at a time. Don’t worry about how it looks, look at how it’s making you feel. Keep taking massive action every single day towards bringing your sexy back, keep creating, planning, evaluating, learning and believing in yourself and your dream. Soon enough, you will be living the life you had only previously been dreaming of.

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection and excitement you crave. Let’s re-ignite your love relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Creating Great Connection

We all crave great connection in our relationships, we seek it and what we think it will give us. Everything we do throughout our whole life screams connection. We humans are created to desire connection, yet we often get it all messed up. We expect our loved ones to magically supply connection without us putting in the work to create it and then we get mad at them for not providing it. We expect them to know exactly what we need to feel connected and resent them when we feel disconnected.

This my friends, is not exclusive to our love relationship, I highly suggest you examine all of your relationships to see how you might be creating resentment, anger and frustration around your relationships. What are you expecting them to do to make you feel connected to them? How might you just love them for all of the reasons you do love them and let go of the rest? We are not going to feel 100% connected to anyone in this world, the goal is to see how each of our relationships fills a connection need and to not expect them to fill connection needs that they’re incapable, or unwilling, to provide.

Now the question that remains is, how do we go about creating great connection in our relationships?

Let’s start off with the definition of connection. Connection is when you feel the emotion of being connected with someone.

Very basically, it is the feeling you have when you think of them.

How beautiful is that definition? It means that we can actually create as much connection as we want, with whomever we want! πŸ˜ƒ It also means that the disconnection we feel is created with our brain and it can be changed, if we so desire, through managing our thoughts. Such good news!!

Why is that beautiful? It’s beautiful because we are then in complete control of whether we feel connected or not. We can stop blaming our loved one for what we perceive to be lack of connection. We can stop expecting them to change and create a brand new perspective on connection with all of the people in our lives.

Are you still following me or have I lost you? Hang with me and let’s look at a few ways you can start creating more connection with your loved one.

What was your early relationship programming?

I start by looking back at how we connected with each of our parents, or anyone who may have played a parenting role in our lives, and look at what they taught. Look at what they taught you about connecting with others, about how to connect as life partners, as well as how to connect with yourself. Look at any disconnections, isolators or inappropriate relationships and what they taught you about connection.

Look at your thought patterning.

What thoughts you have been habitually thinking about your relationships? Are you looking at all of the evidence of how they don’t connect and allowing those thoughts to overshadow all of the ways you do connect with them? When we are looking to the other person to change, blaming them for not fulfilling our connection needs or for not having connection skills, we take all of the focus off of what we can control. We are in complete control of this because it’s all about what’s going on in our heads. There is the other person, our brain and how we feel. What they do is 100% neutral, it’s all what we make their actions mean that hurts us. Once we’re able to start thinking differently and start changing our thought patterning, then we can begin to become creative about how to create more connection.

How connected are you to yourself?

Do you pay attention to your needs and learn how to take care of them or do you neglect and ignore your needs? Maybe you expect someone else to fulfill those needs and then resent them when they don’t.

The best thing I have learned is that what we aren’t able to provide for ourselves will be what we feel we aren’t getting from others.

What does good connection look like for you?

Have you thought about it? When we are aware of our connection needs then we can start creating a network of people who will be able to fill those needs. For example, some of my connection needs are:

  • An outdoor adventurist
  • Intellectual conversation and creation
  • Creative experiences
  • Visionary conversations
  • Physical connection
  • Comic relief
  • Encouragement when I struggle

These are just a few of my connection needs list, some of them I have connections in and others I am in search of someone to fill that connection. Right now I have a list of about 25 connections I desire and it is my job to find someone to fill those connections. We cannot expect our spouses, our children, all of our current friends to fill each of these needs. Expand your circle, find your connections and take the burden off of the people you are expecting to fill them for you.

Find out what connections your partner needs and discover which of them you can fill, talk about it together so that you can both free each other of the obligation to fill all of your connection desires.

Learn how to become a good connector yourself.

When we are focused on what our partner doesn’t bring to the table during your time together, we get stuck on the inside. Stepping outside and thinking of thought provoking questions allows you to become a great connector yourself. You learn how to get people to open up by getting them into a conversation you may have never expected and lead you into a connection you weren’t previously able to see.

All of these tools have given me the ability to change the perspective in all of my relationships. It allows me to see what I love about the people I’m in relationship with instead of what they’re not providing me. When we see it from this view we can nurture that part of the relationship and fully love them for what connection they do provide.

One of the questions I love asking myself is, “What is the connection I am desiring going to give me?” The first time I asked myself this question about my marriage relationship I had some of the following thoughts:

  • I’ll know he loves and cares for me
  • I’ll know he wants to share his life with me
  • I’ll know he thinks I matter

As soon as I realized that these thoughts were available to me even when he doesn’t share, my mind opened wide. I realized I was thinking the opposite of these thoughts, which made me feel disconnected and had me showing up by:

  • Ignoring/avoiding him
  • Not sharing my life with him
  • Blaming him
  • Criticizing him

These actions were getting me a result of not loving myself, not sharing my life out loud and not mattering to myself. I didn’t like these results, so I decided to do something about it, I took control of my connection needs because I discovered it’s my job to do so. Figuring this out gave me so much freedom and I truly hope that this helps give you some freedom as well.

Digging into your connection needs and learning how to fulfill them is all part of my coaching program. This is work that will light you up, spark the flame and turn your relationships into connections you look forward to. If you are looking for some resources to learn about your connection needs and start doing the work of finding people to fill those connections then just send me an email and I’ll send you some action steps you can start taking today. If you’d like to see how my program can turn your relationship into the one you’ve been dreaming of then let’s find time to talk, set up your program inquiry call today and I look forward to chatting with you!

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection and excitement you crave. Let’s re-ignite your marriage relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Relationship Dreams To Reality

Somewhere in the timeline of a love relationship, couples go from crazy in love to waking up dissatisfied with the state of their relationship. This might take anywhere from a couple of months to several years, oftentimes not really noticing the deficiency they are feeling until they are past the point of complacency. Not knowing what steps to take to wake it back up, couples often find themselves accepting their relationship as more like a roommate living situation than one of deep love, connection and fun. You might even say that business partners would be an upgrade to how you would describe your current marriage or committed relationship.

If you’ve stopped coming up with ideas to bring flavor into your marriage, then now is the perfect time to start creating ideas and turning those ideas into your relationship reality.

The process starts with at least one of the partners in the relationship having a desire to change their current state of discontent. Until that desire to change becomes bigger than the desire to stay the same, then nothing will change. Knowing that it only takes one in the relationship for this change to occur makes the process even easier to start, your partner doesn’t even need to know that you are discontent in your relationship.

When our pain of staying the same exceeds the pain, or discomfort, of seeking change that’s when we’re ready to take action. In relationships we get comfortable with the way we are doing our life and don’t know how to start creating change, it feels super uncomfortable to start doing things differently. We might start by seeking what we feel we are missing somewhere outside of our relationship. It might be going out with our friends, in an effort to avoid our partner, doing less things alone with our partner, we might look for hobbies or classes to bring in some excitement, even further distancing us from the one we love the most and avoiding finding a solution to the underlying problem. I’m not at all saying that hanging out with friends, or doing things with other couples, or taking enrichment classes is wrong, I’m just saying that when it’s rooted in a desire to avoid active steps to improve your relationship, then you’re going to get more of the same in your relationship.

Relationship healing is similar to any other life goal that you want to plan the success of:

  1. Come up with a vision for your intimate relationship
  2. Create an action plan
  3. Start taking massive action

It truly is that simple, the difficult part is implementing the action steps you want to take. Our brains are resistant to change, it really wants us to keep everything just as it is, even if we’re not happy with status quo.

Change is difficult because it requires us to be vulnerable, it requires us to get uncomfortable. Discomfort makes us want to quit and that’s why treating it like any other goal and finding a hard why, makes quitting an option that isn’t available.

Let’s look at the steps a bit more closely.

Vision

Here’s where you get to dream, here’s where you ask yourself what your desired romantic relationship looks like. Start a list that has all the things that are 100% crucial for you and then a list of relationship needs that don’t have to come from your partner. Often times early in our love relationships we are expecting our loved one to provide all of our relationship needs and often they do so, until time passes. When we are doing things for our partner that aren’t a want match for us, then we’ll eventually stop doing them. Let’s say your husband used to go to art shows with you, something you love to do but he’s not into it, now he says he’s not interested. That’s not a want match, you want to go, he doesn’t and how can you be ok with that? How can this be your opportunity to connect with your artsy friends?

Then ask yourself why this dream is important to you, list all of the reasons and really take some time with this step.

Then look at all of the hard things you’ve succeeded with in your life and in your relationships, start building up the awareness of your ability to do hard things.

Create an action plan

This is the part where you will list all of the things that will get in the way of you achieving this dream. Brainstorm all of the obstacles and the strategies for overcoming those obstacles. Let me give you some ideas:

  • Overcoming old beliefs you have about your relationship
  • Increasing self confidence
  • Creating a love relationship with yourself
  • Re-writing your past life story, including but not limited to your story about this relationship you are unhappy in
  • Learning new ways to have an unconditional love relationship
  • Learning how to manage your time so you can plan your success

Taking massive action

Massive action is continuing to take action even when it’s uncomfortable, when you want to give up, when it’s hard. Taking action is easy when your actions bring you “success” but when your actions “fail”, this is when things will become difficult, this is when we want to find something easier to do. When we’re afraid to take action because of how it might feel, that’s where a solid hard why is so integrally important. Re-visiting our vision, our hard why, on a daily basis and remembering why we’re here doing this work. When things get difficult our old beliefs with sneak in to tell you that the old existence was just fine, falling back into complacency, this is when our vision can easily get muddy.

Taking massive action to create our future dreams takes grit, perseverance and a solid why to not give up when our actions seem to fail. Taking massive action when our brain is telling us that we should just forget about it, that we should just sit on the opposite end of the couch and read our book instead of asking for a cuddle, is when we will start seeing the results of our work. You will start to see the fruits of your labor and that is what will encourage you to keep going.

My clients know that their desired result is so important to them that they are willing to believe something new. They’re not willing to leave their relationship, yet they’re tired of it staying the same. They know their results will far outweigh their discomfort and they are ready to invest in the magic that happens when they re-ignite their love.

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection and excitement you crave. Let’s re-ignite your marriage relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Self Destructive Behavior

When we think of self destructive behavior we most often think of extremes; suicidal thinking and attempts, cutting, drug use, over drinking, bulimia to name a few. Yet there is a long list that you might not even consider including, for example:

  • Thought patterns that don’t serve us, that have us losing before we start, “I’ll never amount to anything.” “I’ll never be able to have a loving relationship.”
  • Deliberately not taking action with your goals, guaranteeing failure ahead of time
  • Disordered eating of all types including over-eating, under-eating, over exercising to counterbalance food intake
  • Being a negative influence on others
  • Intentional withdrawal
  • Stuffing emotions
  • Acting dumb or incapable of creating results
  • All chemical abuse
  • Feeling sorry for yourself, or self pity, which just encourages inaction
  • Self sabotage and giving up on your desires
  • Over spending and not managing your money
  • Relationship sabotage including: being possessive, acting needy, being violent, emotional manipulation, jealousy and envy
  • Not taking care of yourself physically: not getting enough sleep, not getting movement, poor eating protocol
  • Pornography
  • Gambling
  • Over obsessing of any sort
  • Not attending to your state of mental health and learning how to up-level your life.

These are all learned behaviors that many of us work hard to resist the urge to indulge in. It’s possible that if you engage in any, or many, of these activities you may be labeling yourself as having an addictive personality.

The truth is that self destructive behaviors provide temporary relief, escape, temporary pleasure but over time cause much physical and mental pain.

As a coach I’m not here to dig into why you have developed these behaviors. The work I do with my clients is about teaching them how to handle the why behind these actions. We work on discovering what emotions they are running from and why.

Self destructive behavior is often a symptom of avoiding or resisting emotions. Learning how to process your emotions and determine where they are coming from is the work I do with my clients to start eliminating these destructive behaviors.

We work on our urges to numb the emotions we are feeling by actually feeling them, which starts to change the patterning we’ve deeply engrained into our brains.

Once we learn how to process our emotions we start feeling what delayed gratification feels like and start to decondition old patterns.

Over time we re-wire our brain patterning and discover that actually experiencing our emotions feels good and doesn’t kill us. We start changing our personality into the person we dream of being yet don’t know how to become. We be begin the process of creating a healthy, loving relationship with ourselves.

My clients start living the life they’ve dreamed of but never thought themselves worthy or capable. They start seeing their life in technicolor, high definition and are not one bit interested in going back to their old life. “Relapse” is not relapse, it is a learning tool to grow and understand instead of failure and giving up.

If you, or someone you know, suffers with self destructive behavior I’d love to share my life solution with them. Today could be the first day of their new life.

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection and excitement you crave. I have made it my mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Relationships That Hurt Us

“Hurt” can meal all sorts of things to different people based on their own personal experiences.

Who comes to mind right now when you read the title? Spouse? Mother? Father? Child? Sibling? Friend?

Why do they hurt you?

I really want you to pause and answer that question, not just in your head. Grab a piece of paper, write the question at the top of the sheet, set the timer on your phone for 10 minutes and without any interruption, write down all of the reasons they hurt you.

Maybe it’s:

  • They said something hurtful that can never be taken back. You keep bringing them to life by repeating them over and over in your head, possibly years after they were spoken.
  • Maybe it’s the unforgettable thing they did to you. The video clip in your brain won’t let you leave it in the past.
  • It could be what they don’t do, that thing that you oh so desperately wish they would. Hurting yourself over and over by telling yourself that if they would just do this one thing, then maybe you would know they love you.

My beautiful friend, there are two truths I want to share with you,

  1. Even if they do, or say, what you want, it doesn’t guarantee that you’ll be convinced they love you. You will still be searching for love because you won’t believe them or they’ll eventually do that thing again that proves to you that they weren’t sincere.
  2. Letting go of these stories and finding peace is 100% available to you and it’s available today if you want it to be.

Today I’m going to share some steps you can take today to start stepping out of pain and into freedom from pain. Let’s dig in.

  1. Stop blaming them for all of the things; for how you feel, for the results in your life, for the way you are, for not loving you the way you want or for the pain you unwillingly embrace. You can take your power back today. These, and all of the other thoughts that are creating pain for you, put the power of how you feel into the hands of other people. You my love, are the only person who can change that. You can decide today to never allow that person to control how you think, feel and act.
  2. Stop arguing with what is. Byron Katie tells us that we can argue with reality and we’ll lose, but only 100% of the time. Really let that sink it, I wrote it in my journal a long time ago and those words still has impact in my life, daily. Our past is absolutely perfect, just as it happened, because it did happen, just as it did. What actually happened is real, but re-hashing it again and again only continues to hurt us again and again, not hurting anyone else but ourselves. In my Awaken(YourTrue)You program we do the work of re-writing these stories in a way that lets go of the pain, bringing freedom and complete power into your hands. Re-writing my past has been some of the best work I have done with my coach!
  3. Start telling a new story. The work of re-writing our painful stories, leaving everything out that doesn’t serve us, and adding in everything that is empowering and inspires us to be our best self and eliminate the pain.
  4. Define who you want to be. Here is where your creative mind gets to take over and define for yourself who you want to be in this relationship. Do you want to be the victim or the super star? You are the one who gets to choose. You get to ask yourself how you want to feel about this relationship. If you want to feel love, it’s an emotion you create with your own thoughts and is completely available to you, no matter what they say, no matter what they do.
  5. Start the beautiful work of re-creating yourself. I saved the best for last. Yes, you get to re-design your life. The past can be left in the past and today can be day one of your new life. If it’s a love relationship you desire, then you get to create it, without any participation from the other side. When you do the work to change and design your own love life, you get to do it without the participation of anyone else because you are creating love from within yourself.

There will come a point where your desire to change exceeds the pain you keep inflicting upon yourself. When you reach the point of seeking true relief, not the relief that comes from an external source like food, alcohol, drugs, relationships, material possessions, etc, that’s when you will be ready to take these steps seriously and start applying them.

Redesigning your life and becoming that new creation is the work of self love. Self love that you never thought was available to you. Now yours for the taking and once you taste self love, you will never want to go back to putting your self worth, your self love, in the hands of others. Learning how to love yourself when you’ve never learned how is work that will change your life in ways you would never have imagined and I look forward to taking you down this life changing path!

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection and excitement you crave. I have made it my mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

From Relationship Scarcity To Abundance

It is 100% possible and the journey I take my clients through.

This is the last of a three part series where I dig into my concepts of relationship scarcity and relationship abundance. If you haven’t been following along then I’d strongly suggest you go back to my last two posts before you explore today’s post.

Today I want to talk about the process of going from relationship scarcity to relationship abundance. Let’s start with my definitions for both and see if we can find out where you might be on the relationship continuum.

Relationship scarcity – is when we think there is always a shortness of supply when it comes to our relationships. Not enough of them, not enough love being given, basically always in a state of never enoughness.

Relationship abundance – Always an overabundant amount of love which is overflowing from within oneself.

The process of getting from relationship scarcity to abundance is the meat and potatoes of my Awaken You coaching program. Going from a place of never enoughness to overflowing fullness. It’s going from a heart that is constantly being filled up from an outside vessel, yet always empty, to the place of complete heart healing that finds the heart always full.

The process is one of learning how to watch one’s mind, seeing what is going on in there, on default. Once we are able to see what we’ve been doing as habit, on autopilot, we can then learn how to manage and train it for complete success.

Complete relationship abundance.

Let me share six different ways to start the journey:

Learning how to use the thought model to look at what your current thoughts are producing for you.

This in of itself is a mind blowing, life changing, tool. Once you learn the concept of the thought model and practice using it you learn that all of your thoughts are 100% optional and not unchangeable facts. Through the model we have the ability to see how to change our current personal reality.

Learn how to take your power back by changing old belief systems.

You will start to see how you are giving away your power to others, both in our past and present lives. We learn the process of letting go of old stories and re-writing them in a way that serves us. We learn how to stop looking to our past for evidence of what we will produce in our future. We examine current belief systems and challenge them all.

Learn how to be self confident.

You stop being afraid and start experiencing all of the emotions that are available to us, especially those that keep us from showing up at our full capacity. You learn how to trust yourself and do what you tell yourself you’re going to do.

Dig into relationships that hurt.

You begin to discover the freedom that comes when you are able to release the pain and start moving towards neutrality and, if you choose, unconditional love.

Learn how to let go of self destructive behaviors.

Including over eating, over drinking, over spending, over exercising, people pleasing, over medicating, under performing, by learning how to fully experience what is happening for us instead of numbing out and avoiding.

Learn how to plan for success.

When you know how to manage your brain around time then we can start producing our dream life instead of just hoping.

Stepping into relationship abundance is like stepping through the veil of darkness into a world of utter blinding brightness. It’s a freedom hard to fully describe to the relationally scarce person, but most certainly worth the challenge.

Your life will never be the same once you’ve done this work.

Your taste of freedom, light and love will be a feeling you won’t want to ever let go of and I can’t wait to lead you there!

πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, fun and excitement you crave. I have made it my mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this it and join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

If you’d like to get more empowering emails delivered straight to you and never miss another post please get yourself signed up for my newsletter!