When We Think We Have No One

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That lonely feeling comes when we think we’ve been left behind by all the people we love and are left all alone. We feel hopeless, we disappear, withdraw, binge on whatever distracts us from our pain, we don’t support ourselves, and all of the actions we find ourselves taking have us leaving ourselves behind.

I was coaching someone on this the other day. She couldn’t see anything positive about her situation; she was stuck sitting in a pile of self-pity, unable to crawl out. This is not an uncommon situation to find ourselves when life seems to be throwing us all the wrong cards from the deck. Our mind gets stuck in a downward spiral of negative thinking, and we find it almost impossible to dig up even one positive thought. Today I’m going to be your helping hand by pulling you out of the pool you might find yourself drowning in.

How to get out of the self-pity pile

Ask good questions.

Often, the best tactic out of our mess is to sit in it for a while and assess what is truly happening. Let’s start by asking yourself questions that will get your brain out of its current thought loop. I wrote a post about asking yourself great questions that can help you with this. Asking yourself good questions is a way of directing that incredibly smart brain of yours. Your brain wants to be put to work; it wants to problem solve, so now is as good of a time as any to put it to work on something other than where it is defaulting to with thought errors (thoughts that keep you from moving forward).

  • How did we get here?
  • What is perfect about where we are right now?
  • How are all of the negative thoughts my mind is coming up with not true?
  • If I knew something beautiful was going to come out of this, what would I do right now?
  • How is this all for me?

Really dig into the truth of where you are and then ask yourself this question:

Am I really alone?

Equal air time.

Next it’s time to direct your brain towards all of the positive things you have in your life. When we are stuck in the self-pity pool our brain seems determined to keep punching us in the face, it’s time to set the boxing gloves down and start focusing on something different. I have a fun exercise I have my clients do where they list all of the things they have accomplished in their life, please download it here and start your own list. Every time your brain goes to the negative pull out your list and add some more things to the list, direct that toddler brain!

We are never alone, ever. When we think we are alone we are disconnected from ourselves and we are disconnected from our Creator. One of my favorite quotes by Wayne Dyer is “You cannot be lonely if you like the person you are alone with.”

Sometimes life has a way of forcing us into a spot where we are blessed to be alone. Time alone is time to focus on ourselves, to look in the mirror, give ourselves a high-five and dig in.

Naturally we don’t like when people leave us. There was a point in human existence where it meant being outcast and possibly left to die. Our brain though hasn’t caught up with our modern world, people leaving us doesn’t mean we will die, starve and be eaten by the lions.

Ask yourself how you will utilize this time to grow. How will you trust that everything will work itself out for your good?

You are never alone, ever. If you try my tactics and still can’t seem to get yourself above water then please book yourself a free coaching session or get on my mailing list and join my monthly free coaching public call, every first Wednesday of the month so I can help you move one step forward.

🎧 Audio version of blog here!

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Are you struggling in your love relationship? I would love to help you fall back in love with the one you love. My Awaken(YourTrue)You program is for strong women like you, and a few pretty cool guys, who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. Together we work from the inside out, meaning I teach you how to have a healthy, loving relationship with yourself so you can show up and simply love your partner. Let’s reignite your love relationship today, book your consultation call today!

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Is Fear Pushing You Apart?

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Lately, I have been exploring the emotion of fear in my own life and how it is holding me back from taking powerful steps forward in my journey to develop the close, loving relationship I desire with my husband. The realization became profound when I was actually observing fear of a different kind, fear around a decision. I discovered how I was making decisions based on fear, meaning I was looking at what could go wrong and basing my decision on which choice would “hurt” the least. When I saw this scarcity/protective thinking, I decided to ask a better question. I decided to ask how my decision could be awesome? How could this decision create amazing abundance in my life?

I want to invite you to join me as I ask some tough questions about why we aren’t doing the things that will actually move us forward faster, getting us the results we want instead of the same old stale results that we aren’t happy with.

Fear might be why you aren’t doing that which you want to be doing, but do you really understand what you are afraid of? In reality, it’s not the emotion of fear that keeps us stuck; it’s more the fear of the emotion that will come up for us if we take that step into the unknown. That step into a place where someone might think something about us, having us thinking something about ourselves that might make us feel stupid or unworthy or unlovable – exposed. The funny thing is that what we’re afraid of feeling is an emotion that we are currently burying because we are already thinking that same thought about ourselves. Confused? That’s ok; let’s dig into it, and let me help clear some things up for you.

Let’s start by looking at the typical areas that I see people repeatedly using as excuses for not creating what they want in their life, especially when it comes to our love relationship.

Fear of the things we have full control over.

Time: Why aren’t you creating time to work on your relationship?

Be honest, answer the question.

Every day people tell me that they don’t have time to work on themselves or their relationship. We are constantly putting ourselves on the back burner until something drastic happens. This “drastic” event now has us putting out fires that could have been avoided had we prioritized our time. The truth is that when things come up that are “musts,” we somehow find the time to get them done. Of course, when the car breaks down, you don’t have time or the money to deal with it, but somehow you figure it out. You have a child, of course, you don’t have time or the money to take care of a child, but somehow you figure it out. You get sick; of course, you don’t have time to get better, but divinely, your body has a way of making the time for you.

What if you allowed the fear to be there while you did that which you know will pay off with a rich reward. Fear isn’t stopping you from taking the time to work on yourself and your relationship with your partner; it’s the emotion that comes up when you actually create the time. The shame you might feel when you think you should be doing dishes or laundry instead, the guilt you feel when you think about how you have “neglected” your relationship, feeling stupid that you don’t know where to start, instead of opening up your phone so you can feel better momentarily.

I believe there is an abundant amount of time to do that which is important to me, and this belief serves me well. Ask yourself how important this relationship is to you; maybe it’s really not that important yet, don’t worry because if you wait long enough, the wrong sort of fire will begin to burn. When it does, you will make the time to do the work. I guarantee that work will be a whole lot more uncomfortable than if you prioritize it now. If you want abundance in your love relationship, then my suggestion is to ask yourself to list all of the reasons that taking 15 minutes every day to work on your love relationship is important to you. How will it be exactly what you needed to do?

Money: Why are you afraid to invest in the only thing that will move you forward every single day?

The second place of resistance for most people is the fear of investing money in themselves. People will throw money at all sorts of insignificant material objects as a way to feel better, but why aren’t they taking that money and spending it on something that will payback on that investment over ten-fold? Look at some of the same scenarios I listed with time, when we absolutely need something, like the furnace goes out in the middle of a Minnesota winter, somehow the money shows up.

It makes me sad when I think about how many people don’t believe in their ability to invest in themselves, not reaping the reward of its payoff. Many of us spend the first 20-30 years of our lives investing in our minds, filling it with a bunch of knowledge. Then we run on fumes for the rest of our lives, taking a continuing education class when required but not investing in our minds. We’re afraid of looking in there; we are afraid that we might not be able to figure out the answers, rendering us stupid.

The funny thing is, almost everyone I talk to says the ability to get to the relationship of their dreams and the life of their dreams is something they couldn’t put a price tag on; it’s worth that much to them; until it comes to actually committing. I’ve been there; I was that person; I didn’t believe I could create that dream result, so why bother, until I got desperate. Until I kept trying everything that came my way, still not getting any closer to that dream. Until I learned how to trust myself enough to hire a coach, that’s when I started to see that the best thing I could spend money on was my mind. That investment clearly showed me my scarcity, limited, fearful mindset.

I believe the money we invest in ourselves is worth every penny because it makes me grow; it makes me think outside of my comfort zones; it shows me my weak spots. In my love relationship, it helps me be brave in creating exactly what I want and dedicate every day to doing that work. It helps me dig into why I’m not taking the actions I want to take in my love relationship; it reveals the truth, then allowing me to understand and decide my next steps.

Self Confidence: being all in on yourself

We’re so busy focusing on the outside, trying to get people to like us, trying to get others to open up and talk, and not doing the same ourselves. We are afraid to look inside at why we hate ourselves so much, at why we feel so lost and empty, why we’re scared. Let me tell you something; you will never find what you are looking for in someone else. So many of us are afraid that if we let go of controlling our surroundings, we might drown, but the truth is when you let go and start focusing on yourself, that’s when you learn how to swim.

Remember the saying: a rising tide lifts all boats? You can’t be the rising tide when you are empty inside; you suck up all the water, and everything sinks with you.

Fear of something new

The fear of not knowing what we’re doing; the fear of having to start over. Well, what will you be doing when you lose it all? Doing what you’ve been doing isn’t working, and it is actually pushing you further and further from your goal. It’s not the fear of starting something new and unfamiliar; it’s fear of how you’re going to feel when you think, “I don’t know what I’m doing.” My suggestion is to look at it as a new lease on life; you are purchasing your new self and building it exactly how you want, how you were divinely created to be.

How do you face fear?

Action plan:

I’m going to suggest a few things for you to try, take one and implement it into your daily routine and then let me know what’s working or not working.

  • Time: Schedule 15 minutes every morning before you do anything else, set your alarm 15 minutes earlier than usual, and get out of bed. Take the time to do a thought download, that’s it. Do it every day for seven days. Notice what happens in your mind when it tells you not to take the time, that it really won’t matter, sleep for another 15 minutes. Notice, and then roll on out of that bed anyway.
  • Money: Start keeping track of where every penny goes. Don’t make this hard. Get yourself an old fashioned notebook, every day, write down what you spent money on, and categorize it. Was it essential and necessary, meaning you would die if you hadn’t spent that money? Would they shut off your heat or your electricity? Is it a “luxury” living expense that isn’t necessary: take out, restaurant eating, coffee, non-essential food like liquor, desserts, snacks? Is it a comfort purchase?
  • Solo date: One day a week, plan a date with yourself; it doesn’t need to involve money, go for a walk, ride your bike, sit at the lake, go to a museum and pay attention to your surroundings. Get in touch with yourself and who you really are, take one to two hours to get to know yourself.
  • Planned partner date: Plan something and follow-through, no matter what emotions come up for you. Afterward, take 15 minutes to write about what happened, how you felt, and why.

Whichever idea you decide to go with, I’d like you to pay attention to some of the following things, maybe write them down in a notebook.

  • When you didn’t do what you said you were going to do, ask yourself why. I don’t know isn’t an option, answer the question, ask your brain to calm down and answer. When you continue not to do what you plan to do, you solidify that belief that you have created. The belief that you don’t do what you say you’re going to do. You solidify that lack of trust in yourself. How are you going to change that belief? My recommendation: don’t make it an option, feel uncomfortable, notice how it feels, notice what comes up, breathe through it, and do it anyway.
  • Instead of focusing on all of the things that could go wrong with the action you want to take, list all of the things that could go right. Remember, “wrong” is just something you are thinking, that “wrong” could lead you to the right path.
  • If you do something different, ask yourself why. If you catch yourself in the middle of your scheduled time doing something different, stop yourself and be honest with yourself. Then go down two paragraphs and read.
  • When you don’t do what you said you would do what comes up for you? Shame? Guilt? Anger? Resentment? More feelings for you to look at. Ask yourself why you feel whatever emotion you are feeling, hint: it’s a thought you are thinking.

Lastly, I’d like to suggest three different things to do during the time you have scheduled for yourself and only do one of these three things. Take the time to do what you said you’d do, just sit there, or do a thought download.

Fear is an emotion that keeps us from moving forward and doing that which we really want to do. Taking the time to reflect, do thought downloads, and thought models will help you uncover that emotion that stops you from creating the beautiful relationship you so badly desire. Then ask yourself what is beautiful about the decision to be all in on that which you want to do. Yes, write them all down!

My AwakenYou coaching program is the exact process you need to help you with all of the obstacles you find yourself running up against as you try to figure out how to show up the way you want to show up in your love relationship. I teach you how to overcome all of the objections that you are creating as roadblocks to your best life while having a good time doing it; together let’s knock them all down!

🎧 Audio version of blog here!

💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

Are you struggling in your love relationship? I would love to help you fall back in love with the one you love. My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong women like you, and a few pretty cool guys, who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. Together we work from the inside out, meaning I teach you how to have a healthy, loving relationship with yourself so you can show up and simply love your partner. Let’s reignite your love relationship today, book your consultation call today!

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Swimming and Emotional States

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If you’re wondering what swimming and emotional states have to do with each other then you are about to find out. Personally, I love to swim and believe it is a great antidote when experiencing an emotional state that you want to process. With it’s repetitive, automatic motion, the relaxing sound of the water movement, fresh air filling your lungs, with blue sky speckled with clouds and sun rays dancing off the water, heavenly and thouroughly meditative. If you are someone who has swum in one of the 10,000 lakes of Minnesota for the majority of your life, you will totally get it. Swimmer or not, I think you will be able to appreciate my following swimming analogy when it comes to our different states of emotion.

I came to this analogy while going through an extended “negative” emotional period. I put the word negative in quotations because I prefer not to name an emotion negative or positive, all emotions drive us to take actions, negative emotions have us taking actions that typically keep us from moving forward. In contrast to that thinking though I want to offer that negative emotions, when processed correctly, can actually move us forward by helping us to see what we are creating and using it to learn. When we learn something from any experience we are moving forward.

Some people wrongly assume that once you have experienced working with a coach you will never experience negative emotion. Wrong. This life is meant to be both good and bad, it is a balance called life. Don’t let this assumption keep you from working with a life coach, having someone on your side helping you navigate life is the best gift you could ever give yourself, as well as everyone in your life. Coaching makes going through the negative a whole different experience, read on.

So what is the “50/50”?

When I say 50/50 I’m talking about negative versus positive emotional states. “Good” times versus “bad” times. Times when we feel open and are moving forward versus times when we are feeling closed in and stagnant.

Life will always be a balance of both of these emotional states, often we have times when that ratio is skewed one way or another, more often to the negative.

Currently, I am using the swimming analogy to compare negative emotional states as being under the water while positive emotional states as being above water and looking at a blue sky with the sun sparkling off the water like millions of diamonds.

During this negative emotional state that I was experiencing, I observed that it had been a while since I had endured a mental state that I couldn’t move through. I was then able to compare how this state felt now, after working with several different life coaches, to life prior to learning about coaching.

The 50/50 before life coaching.

The negative 50 seemed more like a 80, 90, or 99. I felt continually pushed under the water by outside forces, against my own will. I believed most of my life was gloomy, and that made the positive barely visible. I needed outside stimulation to make that little bit of positive feel right; no wonder I overate, over drank, or overdid most anything that could make me feel better. All of this proves the philosophy that what we look for, we will find because there were plenty of people who saw my life as perfect.

Once in a while, I would come up for air, and when I did, the sky was mostly cloudy. Even when I used something outside of myself to feel better, I never felt like I ever saw the sun. Whenever I was under the water, maybe I could see the sun, but it was only through the dirty murky water and barely visible.

The 50/50 after coaching.

As I was going through this particular negative stretch what I noticed was that it really wasn’t all that bad. Yeah, I was feeling a bit under the weather but I described it more like bobbing on the water, every once in a while slipping under the water but still being able to see the sun because the water was clear. All the time that I was under the water I knew that the sun and fresh air were right there and I could pop up to grab some. I knew I could stay there a while and enjoy it’s beauty as it sparkled across the waves and then I would pop down under again. All the while knowing it was no big deal. I knew that this was something I was creating, that I could feel it all and be ok, the shore was just a few breaststroke’s away.

In review of the before and after what I most want to impress upon you is the difference in energy between the two scenarios. The “before” scenario keeps you stuck in a state of suffering while the “after” scenario allows you to be present with your pain while continuing to move forward with your life dreams and goals.

There you have it my beautiful friend! Life will always be the contrast of good and bad, the negative along with the positive. When you know that the bad or negative all comes from our thinking, your life will completely change. You will be able to see your emotional states for what they are, that you are creating it all with your very own mind and that you have the power to change it. You enjoy the swim because all around you there is the good with the bad.

Self coaching and working with a coach helps us to see what we are experiencing and why. We can see it is temporary, meaningful and that we are all ok.

Self coaching and coaching will show you that the way to the other side is just a vibration in our body created by our mind with our thinking.

🎧 Audio version of blog here!

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Are you struggling in your love relationship? I would love to help you fall back in love with the one you love. My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong women like you, and a few pretty cool guys, who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. Together we work from the inside out, meaning I teach you how to have a healthy, loving relationship with yourself so you can show up and simply love your partner. Let’s reignite your love relationship today, book your consultation call today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life-changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Know someone hurting in their relationships? If you think they might benefit from hearing this message please share this article with them. You might be the one who leads them to their best life.

Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself and never miss another post, get yourself signed up for my newsletter!

Facts Verses Drama

Today I’m continuing the conversation around the most powerful and freeing tool I teach my clients how to use, the thought model. Last week I talked about the power of getting our thoughts out of our head by doing a thought download and I shared this relationship thought download worksheet to help you with the process. This step alone can move you forward but if you follow this seven-part series and step beyond taking the “junk out of the junk drawer”, you will see how to start creating the life you dream of.

This week I’m going to teach you the difference between the facts and the drama on that list you took out of your head and why it’s so important to know the difference. So often we think that our life circumstances are creating good or bad things in our lives but I teach my clients something different. I teach them that it is the thoughts they have about those facts that are creating the good or bad they are experiencing. This week I’m going to share a freedom that when it was revealed to me, kind of broke my brain. Read on.

Let’s start by looking at facts and thoughts, or drama, separately.

Facts

These are provable, non-emotional statements. Everyone in the world would agree and they are clearly provable in a court of law. Some examples of facts:

  • My husband had three beers last night.
  • My husband said, “I don’t want to go out to dinner tonight.”
  • My husband vacuumed the floors last night.
  • My husband spent $4,000 at the casino last month.

Drama – Thoughts

Thoughts are purely our interpretation of what is actually happening in the world. Thoughts are our opinion of the facts, not the truth. Thoughts usually have emotion, description, subjective words in them.

Some examples of thoughts that we might think about the above factual sentences:

  • My husband drinks too much.
  • My husband doesn’t like going out with me.
  • My husband is so sweet.
  • My husband is selfish.

The fact that our thoughts about reality are optional and changeable is that one completely freeing fact I have to share today. It allows us to question it all, everything we believe.

Does it hurt your head to imagine this concept? It did mine. This might seem simple silly or it might sound completely abstract difficult, either way, please just play along for a bit, just entertain the possibility. If you do this work consistently you will eventually understand and experience new freedom. Knowing certain thoughts you’ve believed most of your life are optional, that the pain they bring is optional, knowing the thoughts that feel like raw truth can be thrown into the trash, liberating. If you learn how to find the facts and separate them from your thoughts you will create magic knowing all of your thoughts are optional. It makes all the difference in re-creating your most important life relationships.

The freedom in knowing that a thought is 100% optional means you have the power to change it. You have the power to change it to something that brings you different results, not the results of your past. Just knowing this fact logically will make your mind start looking for something different and testing new ideas. Knowing that every thought you think is optional, that you get to decide whether it is serving you, whether you want to keep it, is the crack that can let the light in.

Now know this, I also suggest you start questioning thoughts you want to believe and to not let this scare you. Some people are afraid that questioning a thought they want to believe in, like their faith in Jesus Christ as their Savior, could cause them to change their minds. This is 100% possible, you might find evidence that could cause you to change this belief, yet having more evidence allows you to have stronger evidence of what you choose to believe.

I won’t be suggesting you just change, or stop thinking the thought that isn’t serving you. Before you can actually change your thought and produce something different you really have to understand what is going on right now, that you are actually producing a negative result with your thinking. Fun work; just stick around and practice, I promise this works because it’s the real truth.

Benefits of separating out the facts from the drama

Once we can get to the point where we can see the facts as 100% neutral, we can start conceptualizing that any thought is possible. We can start to see when a thought produces pain or tightness and be able to dig into what thought is causing the negative vibration in our body. Even when a thought feels awful, noticing that thinking anything different is impossible at the moment allows us to feel the sting while allowing it, recognizing it and not fighting it. Knowing that it’s just a thought that hurts at the moment and that something different is possible allows the pain to ease a bit. When you’re ready to open up to the possibility of something different, that your thought might be wrong and that it is truly just a thought, then you can start exploring something different.

Next step: implementation.

Last week you practiced doing thought downloads and this week I suggest you continue that practice, just adding a minute on to the end of your practice to look at each sentence. As you look at each sentence decide if it’s fact or drama (a thought). Draw a line through all of the facts on your list. Not many facts in your thought download? No surprise, that’s why it’s called a thought download! Our brains love to fill up with all sorts of thoughts, many of which don’t serve us and glaze over the truth. Follow up next week when I share some information to help you understand those thoughts on your download.

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for women who want to stop hurting in their most intimate relationship. I show you how to stop settling and bring back the love, connection, and excitement you crave. Let’s reignite your love relationship today!

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life-changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability, your future life is waiting for you.

Please share this message with anyone you know who might benefit from hearing this message. Don’t forget to join my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

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Three Ways To Bring Romance Back Into Your Relationship

There was a time when you were truly in love with your spouse, like you wanted to spend every moment with them, they were the center of your life.

Now of course you love them, but really, you can’t stand them. If they would just do all of the things you needed them to do, say all of the things you want them to say, then life would be happily ever after.

Often times in the beginning of relationships we do all of the things that will make the other person show us love in return. We aren’t our true selves, we’re looking for love from outside of ourselves.

If this is the case we typically haven’t learned how to generate love for ourselves. As the relationship starts getting comfortable, or as the old saying goes, once the honeymoon is over, we get tired of the work that goes into trying to get someone to make us feel good.

We start to resent the fact that they aren’t just doing the same things they did, to make us feel good, even though we’re not doing the same things we used to do to generate the reactions that they gave us the feeling of love.

This is the beginning of the breakdown.

We don’t really pay too much attention in the beginning of the breakdown but as time goes on we start to wonder if there is any hope.

I have some amazing news my loves, there most definitely is.

I know this because this was me in my marriage.

Even better news is that you don’t even need your partner to be a part of your game to re-create a hot, steamy, romantic, loving, fun relationship.

All it takes is you.

Ready? Let’s start this!

Make a list of all of the things you want your love to do and then, do it for them.

I know, this most likely isn’t the first thing you wanted to hear but honestly, why do you want them to do the thing? Because YOU want it done? To make YOU happy? Then I suggest you do something amazing for yourself and do that thing for yourself OR just choose to let that thing not be done.

When we put our happiness in the hands of others we are bound to be let down, over and over again.

My guess is you have an operating manual for your spouse. A manual that lists all of the things you want them to do to make you happy. It’s even possible that if you typed the manual out and gave it to them and they actually followed it, that you still wouldn’t be happy.

The best thing I have done is put my happiness in my own hands, not in the hands of someone else.

You know what’s perfect about this? I know exactly what I want and I can either take care of it myself or politely ask my spouse to do it for me but if he doesn’t I have to take my power back and make sure I take care of myself.

I hear your argument. I know them all because they were mine. What I learned is that I was never fully happy putting my happiness in the hands of someone else.

Neither will you.

Challenge yourself to do something uncomfortable.

Step number one might be that one thing. Maybe it is putting that laundry basket away even though it had your husband’s clothing in it. When you take the focus off of why he’s not doing it and focus on the fact that it’s you that will feel amazing when it’s put away, you take back your control.

I’m thinking something even more uncomfortable but the above could be a start. I’m thinking more along the lines of hmmmm….when’s the last time you gave your spouse a long hug and told them how much you appreciate everything they do (not for you) and really say it from the heart?

Feel uncomfortable? Why? What is it you fear?

I challenge you to actually take a moment to stop and answer those two questions. Then ask yourself what it would feel like to do the same thing from a place of self confidence in your ability to do something for yourself. From a place of doing it because it would feel good for YOU.

Write down 10 things you love about your spouse.

Put them on a note in your phone and every morning open that note and read it out loud to yourself.

When we are stuck in a negative thought pattern your brain is conditioned to continue to feed more negative thoughts to you. It’s just helping you out and doing what it is designed to do.

You have to be deliberate about how you direct your thoughts or your brain will always revert to finding what is wrong.

When you tell your brain to look for the positive it will start looking for what you are asking it.

This is going to take you some time, it did for me anyway. I had been so focused on everything he was doing wrong that I just couldn’t think of anything positive. I started with this: he is my husband, he married me, he loves me. If you have to start with one thing then start with the one and just tell your brain to keep looking. Every day add something new to the list.

Soon you will notice yourself starting to feel better.

Soon you will notice the spark coming back.

Be patient friend, that fire has been out for a while, that fire pit is wet and soggy, it’s going to take more than a few swipes of the match to dry it out and then build it to an inferno.

I absolutely love hearing the fun love stories that come back into people’s relationships, all because of the work on one person’s part.

 I love seeing the smile on my client’s faces when they tell me something loving they did.

Not to get someone to love them.

To show themselves how much they love themselves.

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

One Thing You Can Do Today To End Negative Body Image Self Talk

Let me tell you a little secret.

It’s been almost a year since I’ve looked in the mirror and didn’t like what I saw.

Most of my life I have done everything I could to change what I thought was unacceptable about myself.

I exercised.

Educated myself.

I learned how to eat right.

I read self help books.

I learned the latest and greatest makeup tricks.

You know what? None of it mattered. I could always find something negative about myself.

I was never good enough, no matter what anyone else told be, they were all liars.

What changed?

I told myself enough was enough.

I told myself that if God created me exactly the way He did, then it was time to stop arguing with reality and start taking the steps of falling in love with myself.

This might be one of the most difficult things I’ve done in my life, and I’ve overcome some pretty rough obstacles, but it has definitely been the second best thing I’ve done in my life, right after accepting Jesus as my Savior.

Now it’s my mission to help you do the same so let me share my one tip to get you started.

Just decide.

This may make you mad.

This might not be the magic answer you were looking for.

This though IS the magic answer because my guess is that you’ve never really tried.

You see you have conditioned yourself to believe, one thought at a time, that this isn’t true. That you are not enough. That you just haven’t gotten to the right weight. That you haven’t found the right diet. That you haven’t found the right esthetician. That you haven’t found the right product or the right supplement.

Today I suggest that you start noticing your negative self talk.

That is the first step:

Awareness.

Start becoming aware of every time you say something negative about yourself.

I suggest you start a note on your phone and write down every time you tell yourself that you hate your hair, hate your butt, hate your lips, hate your posture, hate your face, hate your body.

Then decide that you won’t allow this any more.

Find a bridge thought.

You are absolutely correct. You cannot go from “I hate my body.” to “I am absolutely beautiful.”, that is why I suggest you start with a bridge thought.

A bridge thought is the first step to crossing the river over to the other side. From where you are right now to the other side where you love everything about yourself.

Possibly that thought is:

“I am becoming the person who loves myself.”

“I might be wrong about myself.”

“Someday I will be able to love myself.”

“I am open to the idea that I am fully beautiful.”

“It’s possible that I am perfectly created and wonderful.”

Give it a try. Take the steps and please let me know how it feels.

Be open to the change my friend, take it from a former self hater, the result is worth the work.

_______________________________________

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.