How To End Your Power Struggle With Food

I have been on an interesting journey with food and today I am going to share a bit of my journey. I am sharing it because I want to bring hope to others who struggle with food and through my years of coaching athletes, I know that it’s a lot of you.

To begin, often times when I ask people if they struggle with food, if food has any power over them, I often get a mixed response. Some will say yes. Some will say no. Some cry out in the pain of their struggle. Yet as the conversation moves forward even those who stated that food had no power over them have discovered the truth, that it does.

Food has control over your mind when there is a whisper to go eat something and you can’t say no.

Food has control over your mind when you can’t sit down to relax without the need to include something to eat.

Food has control over you if you eat food that you made an agreement with yourself not to eat.

Can’t drive by the coffee shop without wanting to stop for a coffee? Where is your power in that moment?

Food doesn’t have power over you only when you wight more than your natural body weight. There are so many of us at, or close, to our natural body weight, maybe even below, who still have a controlling relationship with food.

My relationship with food goes way back to my early childhood developing into a disordered eating habit. This disordered eating revolved around control and resistance, wanting to look a certain way so that people would love me.

I’m not going to get into the deep complexity of my journey but am sharing that because most people have seen me as having massive control around food. Control I had, lots and lots of CONTROL.

In the past year I have been massively applying the principles I teach my stop overeating clients in an effort to truly experience their journey. To be able to teach from a place of sympathy and compassion for what they struggle with is what I am achieving. I am becoming an example of what is possible for everyone.

As I do this work, as I peel back the layers of mind opening acknowledgements, I move closer and closer to a state of complete freedom around food. As I do this work my mind is becoming free, free to spend energy on creating a more fulfilling life for myself and for my clients.

My process works like no other process you have tried to achieve this freedom.

My process works like no other process, but only if you’re willing to put in the work. It’s not easy but it is mind blowing, life changing and radically effective.

It is my belief that here in America, we have a food problem and the solution isn’t in controlling food, it’s in controlling your mind.

The prompt for writing about this came from one of my recent experiences, actually just a few days ago. It was a Sunday afternoon, I was getting ready to go to my brother’s cabin for a week. The day was beautifully playing itself out, until right before I hit the road. Jeff and I were enjoying an early dinner together when it came to me that we should’ve bought a dessert to share.

That was the just the beginning of a long, two hour battle, with my brain.

At that point my brain was driven to have me stop somewhere to get a treat. It was fully justifying every option I passed, I was heading to the cabin, of course you need a treat! My brain was fighting hard. It kept tugging me to pull over and it was determined to win.

At about ninety minutes in I couldn’t help but marvel at how many times I had allowed the urge, watched it dissipate and then BAM, it was right back in my brain.

I spent most of the drive watching my brain, like watching two toddlers in the back seat, lying, kicking, screaming, justifying.

I’m happy to say I won.

The long drive gave me the opportunity to really watch how this all can play out. I allowed myself to watch the play by play of taking the time to pull over, telling myself I’d only eat part of it, but of course eating it all. Possibly even purchasing more for the week, because who doesn’t relax at the cabin with treats?

The food is so powerful!

That is a lie, the power is in you. You have the power to reject the brain’s desire to seek pleasure at your own expense.

You are fighting with your brain, not with the food.

So stop giving your power to the chips, the fancy coffee, the dessert, the second serving, the food after the meal, whatever it is that is calling you into another battle.

You are stronger than the food.

Doing this work teaches you how to re-train your brain out of these old self taught habits.

Every step forward is a step forward.

Every step back should be taken as a learning experience that propels you two steps forward.

If you you live a life chained to the power of food, it’s time to start releasing the chains, I’ve got the hammer and the chisel!

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

Three Ways To Bring Romance Back Into Your Relationship

There was a time when you were truly in love with your spouse, like you wanted to spend every moment with them, they were the center of your life.

Now of course you love them, but really, you can’t stand them. If they would just do all of the things you needed them to do, say all of the things you want them to say, then life would be happily ever after.

Often times in the beginning of relationships we do all of the things that will make the other person show us love in return. We aren’t our true selves, we’re looking for love from outside of ourselves.

If this is the case we typically haven’t learned how to generate love for ourselves. As the relationship starts getting comfortable, or as the old saying goes, once the honeymoon is over, we get tired of the work that goes into trying to get someone to make us feel good.

We start to resent the fact that they aren’t just doing the same things they did, to make us feel good, even though we’re not doing the same things we used to do to generate the reactions that they gave us the feeling of love.

This is the beginning of the breakdown.

We don’t really pay too much attention in the beginning of the breakdown but as time goes on we start to wonder if there is any hope.

I have some amazing news my loves, there most definitely is.

I know this because this was me in my marriage.

Even better news is that you don’t even need your partner to be a part of your game to re-create a hot, steamy, romantic, loving, fun relationship.

All it takes is you.

Ready? Let’s start this!

Make a list of all of the things you want your love to do and then, do it for them.

I know, this most likely isn’t the first thing you wanted to hear but honestly, why do you want them to do the thing? Because YOU want it done? To make YOU happy? Then I suggest you do something amazing for yourself and do that thing for yourself OR just choose to let that thing not be done.

When we put our happiness in the hands of others we are bound to be let down, over and over again.

My guess is you have an operating manual for your spouse. A manual that lists all of the things you want them to do to make you happy. It’s even possible that if you typed the manual out and gave it to them and they actually followed it, that you still wouldn’t be happy.

The best thing I have done is put my happiness in my own hands, not in the hands of someone else.

You know what’s perfect about this? I know exactly what I want and I can either take care of it myself or politely ask my spouse to do it for me but if he doesn’t I have to take my power back and make sure I take care of myself.

I hear your argument. I know them all because they were mine. What I learned is that I was never fully happy putting my happiness in the hands of someone else.

Neither will you.

Challenge yourself to do something uncomfortable.

Step number one might be that one thing. Maybe it is putting that laundry basket away even though it had your husband’s clothing in it. When you take the focus off of why he’s not doing it and focus on the fact that it’s you that will feel amazing when it’s put away, you take back your control.

I’m thinking something even more uncomfortable but the above could be a start. I’m thinking more along the lines of hmmmm….when’s the last time you gave your spouse a long hug and told them how much you appreciate everything they do (not for you) and really say it from the heart?

Feel uncomfortable? Why? What is it you fear?

I challenge you to actually take a moment to stop and answer those two questions. Then ask yourself what it would feel like to do the same thing from a place of self confidence in your ability to do something for yourself. From a place of doing it because it would feel good for YOU.

Write down 10 things you love about your spouse.

Put them on a note in your phone and every morning open that note and read it out loud to yourself.

When we are stuck in a negative thought pattern your brain is conditioned to continue to feed more negative thoughts to you. It’s just helping you out and doing what it is designed to do.

You have to be deliberate about how you direct your thoughts or your brain will always revert to finding what is wrong.

When you tell your brain to look for the positive it will start looking for what you are asking it.

This is going to take you some time, it did for me anyway. I had been so focused on everything he was doing wrong that I just couldn’t think of anything positive. I started with this: he is my husband, he married me, he loves me. If you have to start with one thing then start with the one and just tell your brain to keep looking. Every day add something new to the list.

Soon you will notice yourself starting to feel better.

Soon you will notice the spark coming back.

Be patient friend, that fire has been out for a while, that fire pit is wet and soggy, it’s going to take more than a few swipes of the match to dry it out and then build it to an inferno.

I absolutely love hearing the fun love stories that come back into people’s relationships, all because of the work on one person’s part.

 I love seeing the smile on my client’s faces when they tell me something loving they did.

Not to get someone to love them.

To show themselves how much they love themselves.

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

One Thing You Can Do Today To End Negative Body Image Self Talk

Let me tell you a little secret.

It’s been almost a year since I’ve looked in the mirror and didn’t like what I saw.

Most of my life I have done everything I could to change what I thought was unacceptable about myself.

I exercised.

Educated myself.

I learned how to eat right.

I read self help books.

I learned the latest and greatest makeup tricks.

You know what? None of it mattered. I could always find something negative about myself.

I was never good enough, no matter what anyone else told be, they were all liars.

What changed?

I told myself enough was enough.

I told myself that if God created me exactly the way He did, then it was time to stop arguing with reality and start taking the steps of falling in love with myself.

This might be one of the most difficult things I’ve done in my life, and I’ve overcome some pretty rough obstacles, but it has definitely been the second best thing I’ve done in my life, right after accepting Jesus as my Savior.

Now it’s my mission to help you do the same so let me share my one tip to get you started.

Just decide.

This may make you mad.

This might not be the magic answer you were looking for.

This though IS the magic answer because my guess is that you’ve never really tried.

You see you have conditioned yourself to believe, one thought at a time, that this isn’t true. That you are not enough. That you just haven’t gotten to the right weight. That you haven’t found the right diet. That you haven’t found the right esthetician. That you haven’t found the right product or the right supplement.

Today I suggest that you start noticing your negative self talk.

That is the first step:

Awareness.

Start becoming aware of every time you say something negative about yourself.

I suggest you start a note on your phone and write down every time you tell yourself that you hate your hair, hate your butt, hate your lips, hate your posture, hate your face, hate your body.

Then decide that you won’t allow this any more.

Find a bridge thought.

You are absolutely correct. You cannot go from “I hate my body.” to “I am absolutely beautiful.”, that is why I suggest you start with a bridge thought.

A bridge thought is the first step to crossing the river over to the other side. From where you are right now to the other side where you love everything about yourself.

Possibly that thought is:

“I am becoming the person who loves myself.”

“I might be wrong about myself.”

“Someday I will be able to love myself.”

“I am open to the idea that I am fully beautiful.”

“It’s possible that I am perfectly created and wonderful.”

Give it a try. Take the steps and please let me know how it feels.

Be open to the change my friend, take it from a former self hater, the result is worth the work.

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.