What Is Causing Your Discontent?

Discontent according to Google: dissatisfaction with one’s circumstances.

When you look at your life are you unhappy with your current results?

Are you always wishing something we’re different? If you could just…

change your husband,

change your boss,

change your job,

change your bank account balance.

Do you look at other people’s lives knowing that their life is so much better than yours?

I have some awesome news for you, there is only one thing causing you to feel discontent.

That one thing is your thoughts.

Your thoughts about your life, your thoughts about other people’s lives.

This is awesome because you have the power over the process of changing your thoughts so that you can achieve the results that work for you.

Changing your circumstance isn’t going to create contentment in your life.

Not if your husband does all the things you expect him to.

Not if you get a new husband.

Not if you get a new boss or a new job or a different amount in your bank account.

Temporarily these things may work but you are still you, your thoughts, which create your personality, so with the change in circumstances.

Let me share an example with you that can be translated into whatever circumstance is creating discontent for you in your life.

Let’s look at your job. You hate it. Your boss is controlling. You don’t like the people you work with. You want to find a new job, one that will make you happy.

First, remember that you create your happiness (through your thoughts), not your circumstance.

Second, remember that your brain is traveling with you to that new job and though it may be amazing for a while, the same old brain is going to be thinking the same old way. When you find out that those co-workers weren’t all you thought they were. When your amazing boss gets replaced by a new boss, gets replaced by your old boss. Now the cycle repeats because you haven’t done the work needed to keep this cycle from repeating.

That is what I do for you, I teach you how to see that new boss and those co-workers as the perfect people in your life. I show you how to change them into people that you can actually enjoy going to work with. I even show you how to do that without changing anyone except you.

It’s awesome.

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

A Different Kind Of Argument That You SHOULD Participate In!

Today is Monday and this seems to be the day that my brain likes to argue with me. It never used to argue with me, it would just tell me what to do and I would just listen to it.

Can I just tell you that this has gotten me into a whole lot of trouble in this life so I would highly suggest you read on if you want to avoid that as much as possible. Let me just add that each of my mistakes has made my life more rich and makes this journey that much more colorful but my purpose is to guide you along the easier path and to show you what is truly possible in this life!

Most of us are very familiar with what an argument is all about. Usually it’s between two, or more, people, each having a different opinion and each wanting to prove that their opinion is better than the other.

The need to be right in relationship arguments costs us our peace.

Today though, I want to turn this relationship around into a relationship that DOES warrant a good, strong argument.

It’s the relationship between you and your brain.

I want to ask you, did you know that you could argue with your brain? You can and you should.

Actually, the best thing you can do is question and argue what your brain is telling you.

Most of us just listen to our brain and accept everything it tells us to be truth. What you might not know though is that the brain would prefer you not fight for what you want.

Your brain would prefer you:

not work hard to succeed at your goals,

take the day off,

put that task off for sometime later,

go look at social media instead,

eat the food you told yourself you wouldn’t eat,

not work on that relationship that you have been mending,

spend the money,

drink the drink,

I want to challenge you to start paying attention to what your brain has to offer you, it’s quite interesting how we let it rule over us.

To give the brain credit, it is only doing what it is designed to do, as well as what we have taught it to do. You see, our brains are created to be motivationally driven to seek pleasure, avoid pain and to seek ease, it’s called the motivational triad, which I won’t be getting into today but it is the source of many of our modern problems.

Basically your brain is going to tell you to take the day off or so that task later when it just seems too hard (seek pleasure).

It’s going to tell you to spend the money, eat the food, drink the drink to avoid the pain of whatever negative emotion you may be experiencing (avoid pain).

Then, when things start to get hard, when you’ve done the easy steps towards your goal and now you’re starting to feel uncomfortable, your brain will tell you to take a short cut (create ease).

Once you actually start seeing what the brain is offering you, the next thing I want to do is challenge you to argue with it.

This is going to feel uncomfortable for awhile but once you start doing it you’re going to win and winning will start training it to not think in it’s old way.

Yet sometimes it’s pretty sneaky, like my brain today, and you forget about the fact that you can challenge what it is offering to you.

With practice you will get much quicker at the draw and you will be able to not only argue with your brain but you will also be able to win, always.

Winning these arguments are what will move you forward into the next version of yourself. The version that completes their goals, doesn’t put that task off and doesn’t eat the food or drink the drink.

I love these arguments but even more, I love winning them!

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

 

Being Afraid Your New Freedom Won’t Last

“I’m afraid this freedom won’t last.”

It’s something I often hear from my clients and it comes from our old thinking. It comes from looking to our past for our future results.

This work is about re-wiring your brain, creating new thinking, yet, like anything else, we have to continue the work or our old patterning will come back.

As you start to feel and taste your new found freedom, as you feel the weight of the old you fall away, you will never want to go back to your old way of living. You will feel it, recognize it for what it is because it won’t feel good.

My experience was such a beautiful freedom that I knew I would never go back, sort of like when I gave my life to The Lord.

Yet you still want to guard and protect the work you have done by paying attention to old thinking and reminding it that it no longer lives in you.

Let’s compare it to what God gives us in Proverbs 4:23 “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.”

When I first memorized this verse I saw myself as the guarder of my heart.

This was of course how I thought about it because that is what I had always done.

I protected my heart and my life with control.

When I started to do this work,

When I started to learn what it felt like to love myself fully and to start letting go of my control of others,

This is when I truly understood that I could let go of guarding my heart because through my partnership with the supreme bodyguard of my heart, I could let go.

The Holy Spirit is the ultimate protector of our heart.

How do we protect this freedom that we are cultivating in our hearts?

We want to choose love on a daily basis.

Choosing love casts out fear, just like God’s perfect love.

Control is rooted in fear.

So to make your freedom last you will make it a daily practice to step into love.

If you want to read further on in your bible, I suggest you read John 15: 1-17

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

 

 

When You’re Excluded

Last night I was excluded from a family girls event.

What?!? Can you even believe that?

“They left me out.”

“I must not matter.”

“I’m not important.”

“They don’t like me.”

“Whatever, how rude!”

Yep, it really happened and that’s how I would have reacted in the past. I would have blamed, pouted, felt sorry for myself, beat myself up, been sarcastic, (try to) make everyone feel bad. Of course, if you’ve been following me, we know that we can’t make other people feel bad.

You see, two years ago us Bongiovanni women decided to finally follow through with our Christmas banter about getting together outside of the holidays.

Thanks to my Aunt Mari, we’ve followed through.

Except this year they left me out.

I was actually at a meeting during this get together and after the meeting I had a message from my daughter and a voicemail from my Aunt.

I responded to the text of “Where are you?” with a tapback “?” and then read the transcript from the voicemail and immediately felt a bit sad.

Turns out that the email invitation went to an email that I haven’t used for over 10 years and for a moment I did have a thought that made me feel indignant and cause me to blame and complain. I noticed it, allowed it and then started to look at how this was no big deal.

They went without me and it was awesome.

It was awesome because I got to watch how my new brain handles these new situations, first hand.

I had new thoughts like:

“What a bummer!”

“This is not a big deal.”

“Everything is ok.”

“Nothing has gone wrong here.”

“I am fully worthy, enough, complete.”

You know the best part?

I get the result of loving myself, as well as everyone else, instead of not mattering to myself, or anyone else.

I love my new brain!

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

 

Awaken The True You

Some of us have pasts we want to re-write.

Sometimes we just want to let go of our public identity and just be the, what I call, the wild and unapologetic you.

Sometimes we are afraid of losing ourselves in the process of changing who we are through coaching, fearing that we will lose our identity.

Wherever you fall on the continuum I want to clarify something for you.

You are you.

You will always be you.

This is beautifully true.

You may not believe that today.

That doesn’t make it untrue.

The process of Awakening The True You, only lets go of what isn’t serving you. It strips away all of the layers and chains holding you back, pushing you under, keeping you from revealing that incredibly colorful you.

Do you find this confusing?

I’ll attempt to clear things up for you here by using me as a for instance.

When I am chatting about who I used to be, most people won’t even know the difference. I mean, it’s not like I was some deep, dark, different person. I just wasn’t fully me.

I am still so very much the same.

I am now so very different.

I leave the drama behind.

I am unapologetically me.

I’m not embarrassed of who I am.

I don’t blame others for how I feel.

I don’t regret anything.

I love myself, always.

I love my life, all of it, from the beginning to today.

I am only the True Me.

The Awakened Me.

You see, I haven’t forgotten my past, I’ve re-written, and am re-writing, my past.

My past is now a beautiful story about one strong woman who no longer resents, regrets and resists her past.

I am a woman who turned her life around.

Same life.

Different story.

You may still be confused but you too can Awaken The True You, the process will erase your confusion.

Let me show you how.

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

Why A Strong Belief Will Produce Fruit

Shut up already!

Today, as I was thinking about what to write about this dollar bill I found yesterday on my run, my brain completely blew up.

It blew up when I glanced at a note I had written earlier in the day yesterday.

This is what I had written:

“Investing in yourself will always give you the best return on your money.” 

Right under the word “money” I had written the word “dollar”.

I had written this during a text conversation with a dear friend who was telling me about how he had just booked a consult call with a coach.

I had texted those words, had a mini brainstorm, and then wrote those words on a note to use later.

What I didn’t know is, later in that day I would pick up a dollar on my run.

What I didn’t know is how those words would intertwine with the rest of my day.

Friends – I had to write a blog post on all of this because what started out in my brain as a post about just that dollar bill, what it could signify and solidify a person’s belief, blew up into something so much bigger.

The original post was about belief.

The post was going to be about the power of belief NOT the power of picking up a dollar bill and then running to go buy a lottery ticket in hopes that it was a magical sign.

The post is about the true power of creating a belief that you believe in so powerfully, like your belief that the sun will come up tomorrow.

You believe it so strongly that the belief creates an emotion that drives actions of you fulfilling that belief.

You believe it so powerfully that the world brings to you proof of generating the result of that belief.

This dollar bill doesn’t just represent the value our government puts on it.

This dollar bill represents the power of my belief.

Believe it or not.

It’s your choice.

My only question is this:

What’s the upside to not believing?

A belief that you truly believe is what will produce the results of your dreams. Hard work will produce results, but without belief you will never see the fruit of true abundance of your wildest dreams.

I believe powerfully.

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

What An Intentional Morning Practice Can Do For Your Day

Talk of meditating and being intentional about having a morning practice before you’re off to the races is nothing new.

I’ve been reading about this practice since I was a kid but it’s been around forever, according to Wikipedia, it’s mentioned in the bible 23 times, 19 of those times in the book of Psalms.

I have a morning practice that is important to me and my journey of showing up as the best version of myself every day, but it isn’t always easy and getting to this place has been quite the journey as well.

The problem with getting into a deliberate practice is that we live in a culture that thinks it’s so busy, that thinks there just isn’t time for that nonsense.

I completely disagree.

We can’t afford to not take time for what others may call nonsense.

My morning practice often takes an hour, some special days I allow it to take as long as it takes to get to where I feel it’s done. Then there are days when it is only a few minutes long or done while doing other tasks I do to get ready for my day, like brushing my teeth, washing my face, etc.

The fun fact is I currently get more done in a day than I ever have while hardly ever feeling busy. The even more exciting thing about this for me is that I am still young in the practice of managing my mind, so where all of this will go in the future motivates me to keep going.

I used to feel super guilty about this practice.

“What will other people think.”

“People will think I’m lazy.”

“People will think I’ve lost it.”

All of those thoughts that I used to struggle with, and sometimes still do, are thoughts about how I look to others verses trusting what is best for me in my life.

I then remember that I am the boss of my brain and I reign it back in.

I remind my brain that what others think is their own business, not mine.

I remind myself of how I fully approve of myself and that I am unwilling to reject myself because of others who may reject me.

I remember that I am willing to risk everyone’s rejection, except my own.

I have come to cherish and appreciate the value of this time, not only for me but for everyone that I encounter and pray for during that time.

Part of the practice includes my journal.

My journal is a place where I do daily thought downloads as well as unintentional and intentional thought models.

This journal has a multi-faceted purpose, one of which I experienced today.

This experience prompted this post, so I’d like to share it with you.

As you already know, I do a daily thought download and then look at both unintentional and intentional models from this download.

During my time this morning I was looking at a previous thought model from the day before and the result I had gotten in that model. Suddenly I was overcome with the true – more useful result that allowed me to open up to my next best version of myself.

That’s the power of my journal and this work.

It allows me to update more frequently than my Apple products!

If you are struggling with your morning practice, or just want to get started with one, then I’d love to help you help yourself. Send me an email with some days/times you’re available to chat and let’s start your very first update!

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My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

What Do Feelings Have To Do With Results?

This is such a great question!

So many people ask me why I focus so much on feelings when I talk about maximizing our life or living out our potential.

They really think that all I’m doing is talking to them about the power of positive thinking.

Yes, positive thinking is amazing yet, if we don’t believe the positive thought then we won’t generate the feeling that is needed to drive the actions we want to take. If you have been following me then you know all about the thought model and know that the actions we take will create our end results.

Let’s say you keep telling yourself that you are happy, like a mantra, yet you’re not one bit happy, you will not be able to generate the feeling of happiness. In this exact situation that thought might even make you feel frustrated which will make you show up way differently than happy, obviously creating a way different result than what you are aiming for.

This is what our feelings have to do with our results.

Think about it.

When you’re angry with someone how do you show up?

When you’re overjoyed with that same person how do you show up?

You show up very differently in both scenarios which creates different results. One possibly getting you the result of you being a jerk and the other with you overjoyed with your life at that moment.

Now let’s say when you’re thinking someone is a jerk and you attempt to apply the power of positive thinking and try on “They are totally awesome.” Well I imagine the feeling isn’t overjoyed. Possibly more disbelief and then you end up with a result along the lines of you not being totally awesome.

This is why I talk about feelings so much and teach my clients how to feel feelings and how to learn how to recognize them in your body.

When you start to recognize how different feelings feel in your body you are better able to figure out what feeling you may be experiencing in the moment. You also will be able to start generating feelings that you’re not feeling in the moment just by knowing what it feels like.

Then allowing you to better come up with a thought that could create that feeling.

Feelings are generated by the thoughts we think. You can even generate a feeling by thinking certain thoughts – try it. Think about a vacation you have been on in the past, then think of one of the most relaxing moments on that vacation. I would guess just thinking about it brings about that same vibration in your body as when you actually experienced it in the first place.

Actually, that is all that a memory is – a feeling that our body generates based on thoughts we think about that past memory.

If you would like to dig deeper into all of this and start to understand how all of this works and how it can help you start moving you into your future you at an accelerated pace, then I can help you with that.

Let’s chat soon!

_______________________________________

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

How To Ask Great Questions

Every morning I ask myself a positive question and I write it down at the top of my time management planner.

When we ask our brain questions it will start looking for answers.

I love how our brain works!

Funny thing though is that we most often tend to ask our brain negative questions.

“Why can’t I figure this out?”

“Why can’t I lose this weight?”

“Why is my boss so selfish?”

“Will this ever work?”

They all seem like great questions but when we think about taking action to get the results we want in our life these questions aren’t going to get us the answers we need.

These sort of questions will send the brain looking for answers to these questions, this is some of the answers mine comes up with:

“Um, hello, because you don’t know what you’re doing!”

“I can’t control myself around food.”

“He/she is only looking out for him/herself.”

“Of course not!”

These answers do nothing in the way of helping me find a solution to my problem, or yours.

One thing I tell my clients to do is to ask the exact opposite question, allowing your brain to start searching for different answers, answers that can allow you to start solving the problem!

One of the rules I learned when I started the work of self coaching is that the answer “I don’t know” just isn’t an option, my master coach, Brooke Castillo, won’t allow this as an answer to any question.

No matter what.

“I don’t know” stops you from moving forward, instead I like to ask myself, and my clients, “If you did know, what would you say or do?”

Doing this allows us to take one step forward, then we can ask “What next?” and answer it.

If you knew the answer to your positive question, what would you do next?

I want to share my favorite question to ask lately.

“What would it be like to be…?” and then I enter an emotion like “self confident”.

With this practice I have been watching when I’m coming up with negative thoughts and then I’ll ask myself the question.

I’m pretty jazzed with the results this is producing in my life!

Let me know if you try it and if you do, how it’s working for you, I’d love to help you start asking great questions!

Send me an email if you have questions about this work and I’ll help you move forward!

_______________________________________

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.

When It All Just Doesn’t Make Sense

What is this life all about anyway?

You out there doing all of the things.

Yet no idea why.

Your purpose is gone.

It was never truly there.

This whole time always right there, right inside.

It’s just that no one has told you.

You’re broken.

Broken hearted.

Destructive.

Hopeless.

Lost.

You hate who you are, you hate who you have become.

I just want you to know that I know who you are.

I was you.

Though I lived a life of apparent success, a life that people envied, I was hurt, I was broken.

I didn’t know how to love myself so I sought to destroy myself.

I was too strong for that thought, too strong because I was made for so much more.

Created and protected for a day such as this.

A day when I can tell you that you too were created on purpose, with a purpose.

Your life has shaped you into an instrument to be used in the world.

What will you do with it?

My hope today is that this post will give just one person some hope.

Some hope to pick themselves up, clean themselves up and to open themselves up to their very own possibility.

It’s there, this I know, you just have to love yourself and your Savior enough to go find it.

You were created for so much more, this I know and this I want you to know.

XOX

_______________________________________

My Awaken(TheTrue)You program is for strong, success driven women who want to discover their true self, discover the missing key, find their purpose and then start building a legacy from pure power. I have made it may mission to show you how.

I’d love to offer a free call for you to work out whether or not my program and life changing promise is a fit for you. Either book your call now or send me an email with your availability before your subconscious primitive mind tells you to run and hide.

Please share this message with anyone who you think might benefit from hearing this message and I highly encourage you to get on my mailing list where I send out weekly tips on how to start building love and confidence within yourself.